I figure we’ll end the day on a high note with this one. Because I’ve got another seriously busty photoshoot for you guys from Holly Hagan, aka the British JWoww. The busty British reality TV star is on the cover of the latest issue of Nuts this week, and it looks like she’s ditched that signature purple hair of hers. Which is totally fine by me, because I always found that distracted from Holly’s real trademark: those massive funbags. Enjoy.
Putin does seem pretty intent on bringing the Ukraine back into the old Russian-Soviet fold. But then, he’s never faced the ferocity of the girls from FEMEN. The Ukrainian borne topless feminists who make their way around the world screaming their heads off and covering their bodies in indecipherable text. They’re back!
Check out the latest photos from the Topless FEMEN protestors now in Times Square on WWTDD.
Beauty queen Lisa Opie and I have a classic synergistic relationship going on. She likes to strip down to her tiny little stripety bikinis on the beach and roll around, prance, and pose with her booty in the air. For my part, I like to recline my La-Z-Boy and sip slowly on a vegan malt liquor and make squeaky animal sounds. It seems to be working out perfectly, with supplier and ogler existing in perfect natural harmony.
I have to admit, Lisa might be doing most of the work. Her stellar bikini body just looks good in and out of everything she dons along the shore in Miami, willing all men within peeking distance to peek away. Go on, she won’t bite. Unless you’re the luckiest man in the world. Enjoy.
That would be Fat Man magazine, not necessarily for one of the seventeen nicknames my dad used to call me when he’d come home late from the Buffalo Lodge. Either way, the alluring Danish model Josephine Skriver is posing her black and white and hot all over female form in this periodical for the benefit of people who happen to love sextastic Scandinavians in various forms of undress. I’ll go ahead and peg that number around here at one-hundred percent.
While I’m a color-blind man who really digs color, I have to say, without sounding artsy or snotty, of which I am only one, this black and white photography really can bring out the true beauty in, well, truly beautiful women. I wouldn’t go for it unless I was quite certain I fell into that category. But for the cream of the crop blessed with the genetics of a Josehine Skriver, it really is rather stunning. Though, let’s do the full nekkids in color please. Enjoy.
Well, like I’ve been saying, the competition is very rough at Miami Beach. If you’re one of the mid-40′s Bravo housewife divorcees like Marysol Patton you can bet you’re already facing an uphill battle. And nothing says I’m ready for battle like wearing a sheer top without a bikini on underneath as you splash your big newer funbags in and out of the ocean. It’s definitely a strategy, one I highly endorse at that. You can’t just show up without a plan.
Marysol Patton, you may not quite have the game of the dozens of 20-something international models flocked to South Florida to show off their Pilates and God-given genetically blessed bodies, but you’ve got style and veteran know-how, my dear lady. I applaud you and your wet boobtastic. Enjoy.
I’m not sure what Victoria Silvstedt is searching for in her bikini bottoms, but maybe it’s the power switch to some kind of promotional signage she has to up her competitive bikini mode even higher along the beach in Miami. Everybody, and I mean, every hot woman, from the young to the mature, are getting into this showoff battle. Victoria has an array of brightly colored bikinis, one curvaceous tanned female form, and apparently a Brazilian wax that says she’s not only in this game, she came to win.
One of these days I need to get myself on an Eastern Air Lines flight down to Miami with nothing but a tube of zinc oxide and my camera and get down to the real work of documenting this natural migration of the hotties along the shores of South Florida. You can have your flamingos and polar bear nature videos, I’m going straight for the bikini sextastic. This is simply the high season. Enjoy.
Besame mucho, Catalina Otalvaro. No, not there, lower. You’re getting warmer. Warmer, warmer, hot, hot, crazy hot… but I digress.
Colombian sultry sextastica Catalina Otalvaro is back in another alluring lingerie shoot for Besame lingerie, the preferred provider of silky little underthings down Sudamericana way. You really and truly can’t go wrong with Catalina repping your good with the sheer power of her sultry good looks and that ridiculously hot body. She could be primo fish pimper at the docks. But I’m quite glad she sticks to lingerie. It really is where he true gifts lie. Man, how I’d like to unwrap that gift. Catalina makes me say dang. Enjoy.
You don’t just hire Eva Green to play a badass female warrior, you pay Eva Green to play a badass female warrior who is crazy hot and takes off her top to flash her classical rack as well. By now, many of you have already seen 300: Rise of an Empire, the sequel to the Frank Miller adapted graphic novel film, 300, which scored Gerard Butler about 300,000 women.
If you have, you know that Eva Green and her racktastic is definitely one of the highlights of the film. If you haven’t, well, now you have seen two of the most compelling reasons to go see this movie. Eva Green has always been a brave actress and model. She’s not scared of any nudity. I’d follow her into battle, or the changing room, or wherever. Enjoy.
Officially, Sin City: A Dame to Kill For. For the younger generation, the word ‘dame’ is what you used to call a girl when you had to take off five layers of her clothes just to get to her bush. Yes, I know, they had those too back then. Either way, Sin City 2 has Jessica Alba in not many clothes, which makes it an instant must-see flick this summer.
You can check out snapshots of Jessica Alba showing off in her bra in Sin City 2 on WWTDD.
Learn How To Pick A Lock (Vidhuntr)
It may not be an A-list assignment, but nobody is working harder or showing more this past week in a beachy model shoot than L.A.’s Bo Osinski who is working up a sextastic storm in various guises for the mysterious 138 Water company.
I’ve not heard of Bo before this campaign, but I must say she looks ridiculously hot in every single hot girl cliche wardrobe they’ve put her in this past ten days. From tanks and no bras, shorts and no panties, bikini bottoms to sheer wet tees, she’s running the classic gamut of wicked beach girl ware and making it all look extra special. I’m still not buying this water, but I am imagining bathing in it with Bo. Enjoy.
It’s been relatively quiet on the Watch Dogs front of late. Ubisoft have gone a month or so without thrusting the hypetastic game into our every orifice, which will not do at all. But fear not, because another slice of homicidal hacker action has arrived.
In this spangly new trailer, some additional plot details surface. Aiden Pearce was once a routine hacker. Y’know, the sort of dude who would change his school’s website so the homepage made scathing remarks about the size of the Principal’s wang. When he happened upon classified intel, it all got a little guys-with-guns-knocking-at-4am. A hit was placed upon him, which went awry and resulted in the death of his daughter.
Which is, quite clearly, enough to send anyone on a revenge-y crime spree. And this isn’t a guy you want to piss off. Quite apart from his tech access and prowess (did hitting a damn button on his magic cell phone just black out the whole of Chicago?), he’s got some rather fancy point-blank gun moves. Can you do that in Grand Theft Auto? You bet your ass you can’t.
Elsewhere, it’s confirmed that we can get our Watch Dogs on from May 27.